My Life. Medication Optional.

I left this comment on a blog and it says a lot about me and who I am. I want to remember it, so here it is.

I went to a public high school and debated all four years (I’m 29 now). As a timid, unfocused freshman, in debate I found friends that were like-minded people, I gained confidence and still love speaking to a room. I learned about the world, policies, the government, critical thinking, philosophy and other topics I might never have come across otherwise. Most importantly to me, my love of new things and learning was encouraged and respected, rather than diminished. I never won any trophies, but I wouldn’t trade those days in debate for anything. Some of the best times of my life were spent there.

So, here's a post where I talk about one of the more goofy things that I follow/pay attention to/post about on the Internet. (This is why my blog isn't known to my family and friends, except the husband.)

I hang out at a couple of pro-Kate Gosselin websites. I'm not a super fan or anything, but I liked how she was really organized during the first episodes and how she's got kind of a dry, sarcastic humor to her. I'm sure she's not always a nice person (neither am I) and she does things that don't include her children (me too) and she works outside of the home in a job many people envy (me too, kinda). 

It seems that people are up in arms because she (and it's always she, never she and Jon, you know, the other parent) made her money exploiting her children.  Which, okay, if you think kids on reality TV is wrong, fine. Why aren't you bitching about the Gosselins or Tori and Dean?

What? The Duggars aren't belittiling their husbands on TV? Oh, wait, you said it was about the kids. Some of the Duggar kids have been born on TV. I doubt they gave consent. Why aren't you pissed about that?

Oh, now it's because Kate didn't same money for the kids? Well, I haven't seen a statement from the Duggars saying they did. And if they did, splitting the kids' share 19 ways isn't much money for anyone.  Why isn't that a problem?
I hate to break it to you, but Tori and Dean make most of their money from filming their family and putting their kids on TV. You can see their kids having freak outs and, horrors!, potty training.  Dean does two made-for-TV movies a year and Tori does some jewelry and a few TV cameos. She admitted in her book (which mentions her kiids! Shame!) that she blew through her 90210 cash and her dad didn't leave her much in the way of money, especially with their lifestyle. All of their money comes from filming them with their kids.  They have a nanny, like the Gosselins, they have fights, like the Gosselins, they are estranged from family, like the Gosselins.  Yet, no one seems to be calling CPS trying to take away their kids under the guise of 'protecting' them.  Funny, that. 

I know I don't post as much as I used to, but I've started writing for a place called Demand Studios, so that's taking up much of my writing time.  I've made $30 this week writing for them, so that's awesome. I didn't make much with eHow, but I made some cash, about $2-3 a month.  I like Demand Studios because I can just choose a title (I am bad at picking topics and at titling things) and they pay a flat fee, which is much more gratifying.  It's kind of annoying having to go throuhg a copy editor, but so far everything has been approved with just a rewrite and since I'm new, that's not a big deal. The copy editors have been professional so far and never brisk or rude. I hope to keep writing, not for any major cash or anything, just enough to buy a book or a online game or something once in a while.  If I make $50 a month, I can use my paypal to pay my water bill, and that would certainly make it worthwhile, no?

Sideways - Dierks Bentley
Accidentally in Love - Counting Crows
Stronger - Britney Spears
Ladies Choice - Hairspray Soundtrack
Sin - Nine Inch Nails
Hollaback Girl - Gwen Stefani
Rockstar - Nickelback
Fergalicious- Fergie
So What - Pink
Air Force Ones - Nelly
Psych Theme Song - The Friendly Indians
Rooster - Alice in Chains
Blue - Leann Rimes
Only Hope - Mandy Moore

So yesterday I started two new workouts that were in the May issue of Oxygen Women's Fitness.

Ow.

I did the 6-week ab routine and started the 8 week chin up goal.  My abs and arms ache so bad I took Ibuprofen twice today.  Sweet!

The ab routine is deceptively simple.  It's three exercises, leg raises in the captain's chair (3 sets, 15 reps), side crunches with weights (3x12) and crunches on the ball, with a medicine ball (3x12).

I'm not 100% sure that I believe that the chin-up plan will work.  I have no upper body strength, it turns out.  The first step is to raise the bar on the smith machine so you are about an inch or two above the floor with your arms extended.  Then you bring your feet in until they are planted on floor and lift as high as you can.  I can get halfway.  And I can only do 7 reps out of 12 before I need a break.  I didn't think that my arms were tired after three sets (I completed eventually) so I did a fourth of ten reps.  My arms hurt so damn bad today.  I can feel it in my biceps, shoulders and back.  It just may work.

I worry that I'll drift away from the plan, forget my goal.  I did the couch to 5K plan, but it took two tries to make it.  Maybe writing it here will keep me on plan.

I know I should write more substantive posts, and I will (probably) but for now let's just be grateful for the small things.

Life is super, as always.  I can to a really nice relevation about why I enjoy my job.  It's not an important job or a fancy job.  It do=esn't require a degree of any kind.  It works perfectly for me, though. (If you missed it earlier, I'm a grocery merchandiser, part-time.) I get to go to the store, work my product, order and stock, talk to other vendors, issue credits, plan for the week, etc.  I love it.  It has just enough structure to make me fee comfortable, since I have to do certain things every week and day, but enough freedom to make my life easier. I can alter my schedule if need be, and I can work longer to get projects done as well.

Some times I feel guilty for enjoying it so much, especially when I know several other people who don't love what they do.

What else? Lots of family engagements this week, which is equal parts nice and stressful.  The family is awesome, but we require space from people in order to maintain a sense of peace in the house.  After tonight we should have some free evenings again.

TV-wise , I'm watching Justified (the show I watch with the hubby, very dry and funny), Parenthood (SO GOOD!) and V.  And lots of Noggin. Oh, and The Ultimate Fighter.  I watch that with the husband and he watches Top Chef with me.  Good times.

Okay, so my husband and I have this game where we have some letters on the fridge and we leave each other messages. The thing that makes it fun and weird is that we don't have all the letters, so you have to be creative with the spelling and the letters themselves. It's kind of awesome at times, so I'm going to document it for you.

After a two months of running and tracking my progress (in miles and in pounds lost) I was down ten pounds. On days I didn't run, I used the elliptical or the treadclimber at the gym, instead of walking. After running, trying to walk for an hour was boring and felt pointless. I liked being able to move faster and feeling stronger. I also started lifting weights. I found weightlifting moves and tips in magazines and books and adapted what I could for myself. I started keeping a log of when I exercised, what lifts or cardio I did, how many sets, reps and weight of each. I had a notebook I took to the gym and I tracked everything online at SparkPeople.com. It makes things in to graphs and charts so you can see your progress and you can share your info with other people.

Here are some of the things that helped me change my ideas about fitness and to become more involved in my lifestyle change.

SparkPeople.com, which I briefly mentioned above. SparkPeople is a free website that has everything you need to make substantial lifestyle changes. It has a calorie tracker, fitness tracker, goal setting tips and charts for your progress, an option to create your own SparkPeople page, forums, articles and a lot more. The best part for me was being able to chart what I was eating and how much I was really working out.

Oxygen Women's Fitness. It's a fitness magazine for women, but it's not boring diet tips and endless crunches like you'd get from Shape or Fitness. This has serious diet plans geared towards women who want to push the limits of what their body can do and who are willing to work hard to do it. I learned amazing moves for lifting, saw women who had transformed their figures and got more practical, useful tips than I ever got in any other magazine.

Roni's Weigh (http://ronisweigh.com/). Roni is a fitness success story. She shed 60 lbs and ran a marathon last year and held a fit blogging conference this year. Not only is she a great fitness role model, but when she blogs, it feels like she is talking to you, honestly. Roni is the real deal. (Plus she is sweet enough to answer some of my questions on Twitter and to give support. Thanks Roni!)

Body for Life. Mys sister talked me into doing to Body for Life challenge, which is taking the book's exercise and eating principles and following them for twelve weeks to see results. The workouts are based on intensity and utilize cardio and weights. The eating plan was the best part for me. I learned about planning food in advance and to eat a protein and a carb together at every meal. It was a great way to find foods that are good for me and that will help me achieve my fitness goals.

I'm not perfect about what I eat or working out. I try to hit the gym six days a week. Some weeks I make it, some I don't. Some days I get 40 minutes of intense cardio, some days a moderate 20 minutes is all I can handle. You have to be flexible and listen to your body, but you also have to remember not to sell yourself short. Sometimes my not wanting to go to the gym isn't about the gym, it's about my emotions or laziness or a million other things. Usually by the time I get to the gym and get changed, I remember that I didn't want to be doing this, but by then it's too late, so I do it anyway. That's pretty much my philosophy. Acknowledge my feelings (good and bad) then do it anyway.